You’ve got it! RESULTS!!
That all familiar feeling that finally something has worked and your chosen result is actually happening. You look up from your smart phone, beaming, thrilled at the news in the email and sheer joy starts to well up in your chest. You want to shriek in excitement, but thinking better of it you stifle it, and instead it runs through your shoulders and makes you want to pump your fist and wave your arms around.
Instead of an outward display of jubilation, you settle on the next best thing. You turn to your friend sitting next to you in the cafe and tell her the fantastic news…
We’ve all been there!
Whether it was awards we’ve won, or people who have agreed to help us, or new clients or jobs. Whatever the result, the feeling is often the same.
But what if that very feeling is what is stopping you from sealing the deal and moving on to the next thing?
Now if you’re not used to controversial ideas you may not want to keep reading. But this incredibly counter-intuitive concept will not only change the way you see good and bad news, it will also help you to have more success and more results materialise – just by understanding this one thing.
“Excitement Is Pushing Your Result Away” Click to ReTweet
Think about it. Has every time you’ve been excited always resulted in the outcome you’d have chosen? If you’re like most people I work with, the answer is probably no.
So excitement isn’t a good indicator of success.
What I’d like to suggest to you is this feeling, this excitement that we cultivate, is actually keeping your results from happening.
Not quite following yet? Let me explain.
Let’s start by thinking about something you have.
Now think about something you want, and you’d be excited to receive. It doesn’t matter what it is: material, emotional, social. Whatever. Think about it, and notice how you feel.
Now notice how you feel when you think of something you have. (Maybe also notice how difficult it is to think of something you have. Notice how you think, “we’ll what’s the point in that, I already have it!”)
Now think of something you want again.
And maybe you noticed that those two different things create very different feelings.
Now here’s the controversial bit that once my clients get, there is no stopping them creating what they want in their business:
It’s that feeling, that lusting, longing, excitement feeling that is actually pushing ‘having that outcome’ away from you. Feeling excited is literally a barrier to bringing that into existence.
And you don’t have to take my word for it. Keep reading and you’ll see how you can test it out for yourself.
Excitement Also Says You’re Not Good Enough
This is especially poignant when dealing with people as the feeling of excitement is something you get when you think you’re not worthy of the outcome, or the relationship, or the contact. If you expect that person to respond in a given way, then you wouldn’t feel excited, would you?
It’s the difference between expecting your friend to respond to your text, or a journalist to respond to your press release. If you’re new to promoting with PR, you’re obviously more likely to feel excited. It’s something you want, it’s something you think will help your business, and it’s something you might not think you’re worthy of.
So this feeling of excitement is all about the prospect of getting something you might not think you deserve.
So what do you do about it?
How To Drop The Excitement And Move To Success
1. Awareness. Well, as with everything subtle and powerful, awareness is the first step. Becoming aware of when you’re getting excited about something will allow you to choose to feel differently about it. If you can check in with your feelings every time that important thing comes to mind and ask yourself “Am I pushing this away, or am I allowing it in?”, you will notice you will become more and more in control of how you feel. (And when I say in control, I’m not talking about suppressing the emotion or turning yourself into a robot – I’m talking about getting to the point where you recognise your true worth and that you deserve to have this outcome. The point where there is no reason to feel excited, because you’re worthy of the outcome you want.)
2. Expect success. Expect it to turn out right, without you having to wish and hope. This isn’t about positive thinking though. You still need to get off the sofa and go and do the things that support your outcome. It’s just you don’t spend any thoughts on doubt and “what ifs”. It takes mental strength, and the letting go technique we’ve talked about in previous posts will certain help develop this to the point where you are in control of your thoughts.
3. Be ok with both sides of the result. It’s kind of like a negotiation – except you’re negotiating with the metaphysical universe. If you’re ok with having and not having the result (that you’ve up till now been lusting after) then you can literally be in a place where you can choose to simply have it. But that means that you’re also ok with walking away from the deal. It’s not that you don’t care, but more that you’re happy no matter what happens. If you can strike this balance, you will eliminate that barrier that is pushing your result away.
4. Drop the hang ups. What do I mean by hang ups? Well normally when we really want something it is because we have emotional reasons to want it. We think that an outcome is going to give us safety, control, kudos, admiration, money – whatever. And again, with all wanting, it stops us from having. But these wanting feelings, which are robbing you of your success, can be dropped. If you want to learn how to drop those feelings you can check out this video here:
So there we have it. Controversial, yes. Will it take some work and self-awareness, yes. But will it be worth the effort? Well, think about how much success you want to create, and then tell me that it’s not worth a bit of mental effort.
And as always, I’m here to help. Simply leave a comment and I’ll come back to you…
To Your Inevitable Success,