The Rock And Hard Place
Ever been in that situation when you have to make a decision about something in your business (or even your personal life)? Maybe you remember that feeling of not knowing what to do, feeling wrenched between two choices, and feeling that no matter what you do you’re going to suffer, feel guilty or let someone down?
Maybe you’ve experienced you’re insides being folded in knots and feeling completely overwhelmed and stressed out because you don’t have the answers. Perhaps you feel it as a loss of control. Or maybe a fear that things are all going to fall to pieces around your ears.
But ultimately, even though you’re in this state, you still feel a tremendous pressure to make a decision – because often it is in MAKING the decision that a big part of the anxiety subsides.
But how do you go about making a decision?
And what’s more, how do you make sure it’s a good one?
Well making GOOD decisions is the distinguishing factor between those who succeed in business and those who continually struggle.
The problem is there are hundreds of decisions to make every week, let alone in a year – and half the time we don’t even recognise they are significant decisions, until we’re sitting back waiting for the next financial year to approach and wondering what on earth we could have done differently to affect a better result.
Effective Decision Making is the single most important factor in creating a successful life.
Laura Leigh Clarke
And yet no one teaches how to make good decisions. Go figure.
And so what is the one thing that leads to good decision-making?
Clarity is a state where we have the awareness and the resourcefulness to make a good decision based on the information available.
And yet when the stakes are high, and we feel like we’re being caught between a rock and a hard place, with thoughts spinning at ten to the dozen, clarity is the very thing that eludes us.
So the real question is – how do we go about getting clarity?
How To Get Rock-Solid, Crystal Clarity
Well, clarity comes from a quiet and aware mind. And this comes from not having a lot of push and pull going on in your subconscious mind.
But the subconscious mind is mostly very misunderstood – and it’s not a place that most business books tend to talk about or encourage us to delve into.
But I’m going to break that pattern, and suggest we do indeed delve in, as what I’ve found is that by rooting out the subconscious tangles, I’ve been able to help people increase their decision-making ability and therefore their income by ridiculous amounts.
So keep reading, and you’ll find the time you invest in this now, will pay dividends well into the future.
You’ve been LIED to
If you’ve done any kind of Western personal development or therapy over the last 100 or so years, you will at some point probably have been told that we are at the mercy of our unconscious minds.
And so there have evolved tools, techniques and a myriad of “technologies” to help us negotiate changes within our subconscious mind, or at the very least gloss over them.
The underlying supposition is simply that there is something we aren’t in control of that is dictating the direction of our lives.
This is half-true and half false… and what I’d like to uncover for you in this article is how you can make the unconscious conscious in order to:
- make better business decisions
- become more effective as a business leader, and
- ultimately craft the life you really want, rather than being at the mercy of your own internal limitations (which at the moment you may think are outside of you)
So let’s get rocking 😉
Why You’re Not At The Mercy of Your Unconscious Mind
Let’s, first of all, expose this myth.
We are not really at the mercy of our subconscious mind. In fact, we are very much in control of it – once we start to look at it.
The problem is that most of us are completely unaware of what is going on in our own mind, and how that is filtering information, and creating a reality we have to constantly battle with, simply because we aren’t looking at what is going on with our inner thoughts.
So in this sense, we are at the mercy of our subconscious, simply because we choose not to be aware.
But as we’ve already said, when we look at it we realise very quickly that this inner wiring, these inner thought patterns that we start to recognise are completely of our own making.
So, the truth is, when we are unaware, we are subject to whatever bleak horizon lays within our unconscious mind. Yet when we become aware of a pattern, we are actually free to drop it.
Now, at first, when we start to recognise our thoughts, we realise that there are a) lots of them, and b) they move pretty quickly.
The trick is to take each one out in turn, and let them go, so that it reduces both the number and the speed at which you experience them.
What you will notice is that after a little while, you can recognise more freely what is really going on in your unconscious thoughts.
Immediately you will have more CLARITY. (And remember we said clarity is necessary for good decisions.)
I have found over and over again, for myself and my clients, that as soon as they start doing this work, they make better business decisions.
As a result of better decisions, they make more money, waste less time on ideas that won’t work, and find themselves in better company, working with people who are more aligned to their core values and direction than ever before.
So how do you go about getting to this place where you automatically see with more clarity and make better business decisions?
Let’s now turn to the “how-to”…
How To Clear Out The Decision-Tangles
Say you have a decision to make and whichever way you cut it you feel you have to compromise, or let someone down, or you personally feel you will suffer. In essence, each option is unsatisfactory.
Now, let’s assume you have taken on board the model that our world, and problems, are created by our deep-rooted beliefs.
That being the case, if you let go of the thoughts about the problem, and those “unconscious” beliefs, the situation itself will evaporate. This is in effect precisely what happens.
In fact, as you are starting to see, you can resolve all of your problems, simply by letting go of the tangle of thoughts that are keeping things in your “unconscious” mind trapped, by this singular way of thinking, feeling and filtering the information you have.
What’s more, when you are dealing with others, other peoples’ opinions and preferences will also shift and open up to new possible options.
What’s happening is that as you take off the top layer of thoughts and feelings, you’re allowing the next layer to come up. It’s like your awareness is reaching down deeper into the subconscious part of the mind – like an iceberg tip being lifted higher and higher above the water line. As the iceberg is lifted higher, more and more is exposed… and in the same way, more and more of these previously unconscious patterns and beliefs are exposed too.
So How Does Increased Awareness Help Us Make Better Decisions?
I’ve had many instances where clients have had difficult decisions to make in restructuring their business, and as they started using this ‘letting go of thoughts method’, the right people showed up to join the business, and others naturally left to pursue other things.
Time and again it worked out beautifully. It takes the pressure off you as being the one who has to control everything and make the tough decisions.
Not only that, but where tough decisions have to be made, you get to make them in a more positive and loving way.
I recall an instance where someone I was coaching needed to stop working with a business partner because he realised deep down their values weren’t aligned.
My client was tied up with feelings of guilt, but then also of anger at how someone could behave that way.
When he released, he let go of all the emotional charge around the situation, as well as the patterns he realised he had been carrying from childhood, that hadn’t been apparent before this work… and he managed to make the separation from this person effortlessly and without drama and repercussions.
It was the fear of drama and repercussions that had kept him trapped for so long – but in recognising those things that were previously “unconscious” and being able to release the charge around the situation, it freed him up to make a positive decision for himself and his business.
And you can do the same too.
Five Steps to Making a Better Decision About A Situation
1. So right now, think about a situation that you feel is keeping you stifled or trapped in some way. And in previous times when you’ve thought about it you may notice that you have always come back to the same conclusion that “it’s not worth rocking the boat”, or it would be more costly to change it… and so you make the most of the difficult situation, being just a little bit miserable in the process. This can be related to your business, the people you deal with, your clients. Whatever. Just think of somewhere where you’ve made a decision to put up with it, or you’d like to make a better decision now.
2. Now write down all the things that come to mind when you think of that situation. Go through everything that comes to mind and just write a note. You will probably end up with at least 20 thoughts immediately.
3. Now read through every thought you’ve written down, and make the decision that for a moment you’re going to believe that it isn’t necessarily true or false… that it’s just a thought, and it’s not going to affect how you think or feel about the situation for a few moments. What we’re doing here is temporarily taking off that layer of thoughts so that new ones can come to the surface. (If you’d like to take these off permanently, to open yourself up to new possibilities, the low-cost Money Mentoring Group I run teaches exactly this).
4. Now, having suspended the top layer of thoughts on the situation, you’ve opened yourself up to having new thoughts, and new feelings about it. What are those thoughts and feelings? You may want to write those down now.
5. Now read back through those new thoughts.
Perhaps you’ve surprised yourself. Perhaps you’ve found a new, creative way to resolve that situation by changing something, or moving on. Notice how you FEEL differently about it. In most cases people feel a lot more positive about it, and more positive about how they can affect meaningful change.
To Better Business Decisions!