Life brings us lessons in many guises to help enhance our personal growth, and live a more fulfilling life. Although at times we think we are not ready the tutorial still manifest so we have to deal with it.
One of the most arduous lessons in life is the death of a loved one even typing this sentence brings a knot back into my tummy.
They say nothing can prepare you for just what comes, pain deeper than the never ending ocean. Emotions surreal, but the agony is very real.
Death rocks your whole world; I recently lost my younger brother to cancer late last year. At the time I was not interested in what the lesson was, I just wanted by little brother back.
Grief, is Pandora’s box being opened ,it’s so strange having struggled for the past nine months to best describe it, I took a look in the thesaurus says it’s sorrow, heartache, anguish, pain, misery, unhappiness, and the last word was joy, at first it seemed out of place, how could one feel joy?
In truth I remember not so much joy but having some real laugh out loud moments, and yet feeling all of the other at the same time, now that is mind blowing.
Guilt also crops up at lot, it stopped my laughs in there tracks many times because my brother was dead surely this was in bad taste to laugh and smile, but you know what, I did, was and it felt good at the time if only for a moment.
Heartache is also added to the mix, it was like my chest had been ripped open and ton of bricks plied on to my heart, and I had to carry them around with me quite literally a very heavy sensation for a long while.
Looking back I ran on auto pilot after the death of my brother, however the positives from this sad encounter continue to emerge on a daily basis, I now realise I was able to tap into my life experience of motherhood, business knowledge and as a writer.
This helped me to organise the funeral arrangements, keeping me focused and sane most of the time. He had a lovely send off.
It took a huge amount of strength; courage and determination to get this far; funny those are also the three main words that best described my brother.
It turns out both domestic and professional experiences are often lanced with valuable transferable skills. The two areas cross over regularly, and can help us to navigate through life cross roads.
The saying “time is the greatest a healer” does ring true, the grief is lighter now, and life is better, I had no idea I would make it through but I have, and the lessons I have learnt are:
1: Every day is a gift, appreciate every minute of it.
2: Whenever I am challenged I think of my brother and those three words, strength, courage and determination and apply them with love.
Remember life will bless you with unexpected gifts.
About the Author Karyn Bascombe: I call myself a late starter; to the career and business world that is, but that’s no disadvantage, not understanding I had entered the university call life when I became a mum at 21! So therefore had been busy attaining degrees, and qualifications of all kinds without realising it, until now. Lucky me I say. I am a proud single mother of 3 children 21, 17, and 7; they are my daily inspiration. I am a freelance feature writer, and I also create and deliver inspirational programmes for girls. I love what I do, my one important rule of thumb is, always remember people first!
Feel free to contact me